A Bit of a Script

 Here is a bit of a script I have been working on:

INT. LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

The room is dimly lit. The TV flickers with some old sitcom, maybe something cheesy like Full House reruns. SIMON and EMMA are sitting on opposite ends of a ratty old couch. They've got snacks on the table in front of them, mostly untouched. SIMON tries to keep his cool as he edges a little closer to EMMA, who is entirely focused on the TV.

SIMON
(pretending to stretch)
You know, it’s funny... sitting here watching Full House. Kinda feels like... we're the couple right now. You ever think about that?

EMMA
(rolls her eyes, amused)
Oh yeah, totally. You’re definitely the Danny Tanner in this situation.

SIMON
(chuckling)
Hey, Danny’s a catch. You seen his hair? Impeccable. And I'm not saying I'm Danny, but... maybe I'm, like, Joey. You know, the funny one. The one you could totally end up... with?

EMMA
Look, Simon, if I wanted to end up with a guy who makes weird cartoon voices all the time, I’d have started dating the YouTube guy with a million impressions.

SIMON
(grinning)
Come on, it's... it’s just us here. Nobody to impress. What do you say, little Netflix and... hang out... maybe... without the Netflix part?

EMMA
(snickers)
Smooth. Real smooth. You know, you’re lucky you’re even getting Netflix. I could’ve chosen HBO. No chance of snuggling up to The Wire, right?

SIMON
Hey, I could snuggle to The Wire if I had to. Nothing says romantic like... gritty Baltimore crime. But, look, what if we, I don’t know, gave snuggling a try? Just to see if... we’re compatible. For scientific reasons.

EMMA
(laughs)
Scientific? You're gonna tell me Dr. Simon here is conducting a study? What's the hypothesis, exactly?

SIMON
The hypothesis is: if we get closer... maybe you'll realize I’m not just a funny, couch-bound presence. Maybe there's a real romantic... chemistry thing going on here.

EMMA
(amused)
So you're saying... like a sitcom, this has been building all season and now we’re just supposed to... have the big moment? Just because?

SIMON
(leaning in)
That’s exactly what I’m saying. You know, like that scene where Ross and Rachel just... boom! It happens. Life-changing, soul-shaking moment. Just, in our case, I’d hope... less complicated.

EMMA
(squints at him)
Are you comparing yourself to Ross Geller right now?

SIMON
(grinning)
Maybe! Or... like, a cooler version of him. You know, without the multiple divorces. I just think maybe we should... find out if we're one of those couples people would root for. Just, like... a kiss?

EMMA
You’re really leaning into the rom-com thing here, huh?

SIMON
Guilty. But hey, if this were a rom-com, right now you’d look at me, sigh, and say, “Oh, Simon, I’ve felt this way for so long…” and then we’d... cut to the credits.

EMMA
(smirking)
Alright, Simon. How about this? I lean in... we do the whole epic kiss thing... but then the screen goes black and we never speak of it again.

SIMON
(devious grin)
Deal. Total movie magic. Let's give the people what they want.

They lean in, and just before they kiss—

EMMA
(pauses, inches from his face)
Wait, Simon. If we do this, I’m not gonna hear about it from the guys, am I?

SIMON
(stammering)
N-no, of course not! It’s just... between us. Cross my heart.

They look at each other for a moment. Then EMMA grabs the remote and turns up the TV, breaking the tension.

EMMA
Alright, back to Full House.